You want that second date if you have chemistry, right? Don’t mess it up with sh*tty behavior.
So, if this is common knowledge, why do so many of my dating coaching and matchmaking clients keep telling me woeful tales about lousy first date behavior?
Can you promise me something? Promise me that you’ll never, EVER again—(scout’s honor)—do any of these 5 disastrous things on a date:
1. Share your first date battle stories.
Yes, you’ve had dating disappointments—you’ve been lied to, misled and taken advantage of. You’ve got war stories, but who doesn’t?
As funny as you think your tales of woe are, retelling those tales to a new love prospect sets you up as the victim and makes your date feel like your personal garbage dump. So, rather than “go there,” just zip it! This is just a first date. Keep things up-tempo and bring the conversation back to the present and future.
2. Act distracted or not focused on your date.
Always arrive on time (or early), collected and calm, and silence your cell phone. Here’s a critical dating tip: practice being in the present and give this new person the gift of your focused, undivided attention. Narrow your peripheral vision to lock in only on the person in front of you. Awaken your natural curiosity, tune out the noise all around you, and listen attentively to every word this new person shares with you.
One of my clients just shared with me his post-date feedback from a first date with a lovely woman. He said, “What was so delightful about being with her is that she made me feel like I was the only person in the room … and the only man on her mind, which was a rare and delightful experience.” continue to point 3 …